insurgo

Dark Lord ...

2011-03-15T01:26:00.000-07:00

I didn't write this.. but the one who wrote will never publish...

before i decide to press the shift+delete button, before it fades away from my memory..

I want to post it some where...

So with out your permission am posting this here.. I don't know whether you will agree or as usual get angry at me ... but then you will never know I posted this here cause you stopped listening to my voice long ago.....

Dark Lord

You came out of the dark

Wonder what you really are

A childish fantasy???

A hope filled ecstasy??

Or was it just a coincidence!

Now that i know you

I know what you really are

The Dark Lord!!

Though lord of the dark

You do bring light

At moments of despair

At times of crisis

But then you are too adamant

Preferring to stay in the dark

Filling your life with despair

Seeing hope you turn the other way

You fill your world with darkness

But one fine day it will change

The light will break through

And you will find the real you..!

Nit saga 2nd part

2009-02-01T06:39:00.000-08:00

Before starting the next part, i wanna say one thing- wat ever u may read in the following part is purely imaginary and it doesn't have any resemblance to any living or dead persons....and if u still thing it has any resemblance then sorry Sudeep .. am not responsible......

So after battling the CAT for about two and half hours we were finally out of the hall.....The long train journey and the exam had almost drained the last bit of energy from us ,, and the hot and humid climate of the north kerala was making things more worse...... but still the the happy ending that's gonna happen was making me forgot all those hardships that we faced so far....Like they say- "you are not gonna achieve anything without paying the price for it..."

So our next intended stop was NIT ..but before that we have to fulfil some of the basic needs of human beings... The call of hunger was much more important any thing...So after wandering through the streets for a while we finally reached at the much famed-"SAGAR". hotel...I have never ever before tasted the famous-"malabar biriyani",,so tis is finally my chance..Since living along with friends whom belonged to this part of the kerala and hearing their hyped stories about the famous biriyani......I always wanted to have a go for it.....so another small dream is being fulfilling for me....So when the waiter came I didn't have any hesitation in ordering wat I wanted.....Now here also my dear friend came to my rescue..On hearing wat am ordering he reminded me that since I was taking some ayurvedic medicine I am not supposed to have any non -veg items....His response was so quick tat i wondered whether tat was the final question for any million dollar quiz in which the first one to answer was to carry away all the cash prize.....Thanking him for his remainder and cursing the one who invented that ayurveda medicine I asked the waiter for a veg-biriyani.....Looking to me like i hav asked for a cocaine or something like tat he said a sharp NO... So as i struggled with my parotta and kuruma I saw my friend enjoying his biriyani.... hmm dunno whether you guys have tis experience of having your favourite meal in front of you ..but all u could do was to simply watch .....believe me its really awkard ........... Any how I thanked my dear friend for his concern...

SO we resumed our journey ,, and finally reached the NIT around 3.00......

THE NIT SAGA!! part-1 exam

2009-01-25T18:44:00.000-08:00

This is a true story and the characters involved in it are two of my best friends.. Since one of them wont ever write this ( well he is prolific writer) and other dont have the habit of blogging , am taking the right of posting this one.... For the ease of narrating am taking up one of the character...

It was during the seventh semester... This was the sem. which most of us waited eagerly from the very first day when we set our foot in this college..semester of placements as some may say.... Any ways after 3 years of college life ( wit a GPA which was falling to an all time low ) I had dropped the idea of getting placed in campus placements... Anyways thanxs to recession I got a perfect excuse of not getting placed , dunno wat shud be my excuse if ther wasnt any recession....Well as always (or I say thanxs to God's grace ) I wasnt alone, like true friends who stand with us during the time of despair ther were a few freinds wit me who also got screwed up.. One among them was the second character in this story..Lets name him "SCN".. Unlike me he was a person of positive attitude.. dunno whether the obama fever has affected him too, now a days he uses the words lik "hope" ,"change" more than often....Well cause of his constant pressure me too decide to do something rather than waiting for the heaven to drop something in front of me....Well after four years of engg. GATE was a straight no... the next option was CAT.. but i haven't started preparing for the CAT-08, Here also he came to my aid-- "we can write the cat-08 just for practise and we shall prepare for the next one" ..even though I was reluctant at this idea he finally convinced me.. Such a caring nice friend., I must be really lucky to hav sumone lik him with me .....

Like the past 3 years days passed even before i realized they were even there...God must have pushed the fast forward switch a bit too often.. As i was quiet busy in watching movies and all ..I haven't realized the day for CAT exam was fast approaching.. One day as usual i was sitting lazily in front of my system listening to some music., he came to my room and asked -"dude wat abt CAT" .. Well for a few seconds i was totally blank.. It took me a minute or so to remember tat i hav applied for CAT and the Hall ticket were somewhere between those DVD's which decorated my table .. Well again the demon inside me was the one who answered his questions... I put forward all the reason's which I could figure out , to convince him ther was no point in writing the xam- it was waste of money,time etc.......and above all we havnt reserved any tickets , so travelling would be like hell... But he wasnt sumone who wud give up so quickly..and when he saw his good words arent making any changes , he put forth his trump card.. The vast number of gals who wud turn up for t xam.. well it made a slight change in my attitude ,but not significant though...then came his second offer.- he had 4-5 gals in NIT LH who he hav met through orkut and he would like to introduce them to me and can hav a short trip to hostel...He then elaborated about his friends how friendly they were..and we all can go for some outing in the evening.... Now this bait was too large for me to avoid..I have already heard some stories about them, eventhough all of them may not be true there must some truth in it. This idea made me excited .Even if I couldnt make all of them friends I could make a few of them (and may be I can make friends of their friends and get some phone numbers..).. and can have a trip to hostel.....Well it seems to be a nice idea rather than sitting infront of my system for the whole day....Hmmmm he is again proving to be a nice friend..I again thanked God for providing me wit such a nice caring friend... ...

As I expected journey was like hell....The general compartment was jam packed and the fact that it was a weekend made things more difficult.. We could barely sleep during that long journey, but the sweet memories of " NIT LH" freshened me up.. Even during the journey he talked about his gal friends there.. And we had a little discussion how to spend the evening with them........ We reached the station at morning , after some refreshments we went straight to the exam hall...... the exam halls wasn't as we expected , it seems boys were more interested in tackling the CAT .. and even few gals present were buried in some CAT texts.. Any way inside the hall it seems all familiar -- like last 3 years I found myself staring at a question paper which I couldnt understand at all...It took even few minutes for me to decide whether to go for a blind marking or to try out some of them...and finally i decided to try out those questions..Well it didnt took me long to realise tat the name CAT was such an absurd name it shud be rather "PULLI" or something like that.. Anyway the unseen terrains of NIT which we were soon to explored soon, kept me awake......

to be continued..............

P.S : bro am expecting ur reply before publishing the second one......

"BRUTUS" in my perspective....

2008-11-21T21:02:00.000-08:00

" You too Brutus"- -- my friend yelled at me as I walked out of the class after sitting in that boring class for about two hours...I was in rage for a moment -i have to sit through that class for two hours((but it seemed ages inside tat four walls , many a times i thought my watch was not working,,the minutes hand seems to have stopped moving or it was moving slower than usual)),and ,my friend is calling me traitor!!!!..what the hell is wrong with him...seeing me in a bad mood he clarified it for me --the teacher have already warned us about forthcoming danger ( the two hour class ) , and my friends have decided to bunk that class even though attendance was becoming a serious problem for us..and none of us in our gang were supposed to go against the decision..but i have betrayed them and that have made him call me Brutus..but what really happened was as i had already bunked the forenoon session I was totally unaware of the teachers announcement and subsequent decision of my friends...and he had forgotten the fact that I wasn't there in the morning and after my clarification the misunderstanding was sorted out....

But something remained in my mind even after the incident..it was the usage of the name -"BRUTUS"..It still made an uncomfortable feeling even after i reached home...I have been hearing the name even before I know who he was or what he did...He was the symbol of betrayal, the perfect example of how a friend should not be..Like Hitler who was often symbolized as the monument of cruelty,Brutus was often considered as a monument of betrayal...His name become a common usage in political spectrum where back stabbing and betrayal was considered as an inevitable part of the system... but do he really really deserves such kind of treatment from the society... No one really seems to bother why he put that dagger into Caesar's body..was it just a case of betrayal or something else..It wasn't greed or jealousy that propelled him for committing that sin which would put him into the dark pages of history.. For Brutus- Caesar was a fast becoming a tyrant who was a threat to the Roman principle's of democracy , so when he was forced to choose between friendship and Rome ,,like any true patriot he choose his love for the country.. and i strongly belief that it might not have been an easy decision by any means, the fond memories of his friendship might have flashed through his eyes a 1000 times before he decided to do what he thought was the right thing ... but to his misfortune history decided to think otherwise, the act of murder which Brutus thought he was doing for his fellow citizens made him a mere conspirator who plotted against his best friend ..the act which was bound to bring glory to him eventually put disgrace on his name...

I don't know whether the act of Brutus can be justified .. for i doubt Caesar would have become a tyrant as they all feared ... but the morality behind his action cannot be questioned either.. he was doing that crime for his nation, for the principle's which he held higher than his love for his friend.. Like a true a patriot he did what he thought was the best for his nation.. he might have thought his name would written in the history as a patriot,but he eventually topped the list of traitors the world had ever seen .. Strange but that's what history do with you..mainly because of the fact that history is written by those who have won the battles.. may be if Brutus have defeated Mark Antony we would have known him in another(better) way.. Anyways sorry to say but he will always be remembered as traitor and not the other way around and people will continue to use his name for portraying the act of treacheries ..

Don't know whether my friends have decided to put the tag of Brutus on me permanently .. but I have decided something ,whatever may happen I will never ever use his name in a negative manner.......

HER!!!!

2008-11-12T04:41:00.000-08:00

i was little confused about wat the title should be....many names came into my mind but none seems to satisfy me,,,i cant call her mine because she was never mine and am sure tat wud remain the case for ever,,,,and finally ended with this title,,,
Its almost six years since i have seen her,,thought time will remove all my feelings for her,,,but it hasnt,,it still remains a wound deep inside reminding me what i missed all these years,,,,its really funny cause i was sumone who never believed in true love,, always thought its something u would find in movies and novels
...but she just changed everything- her presence made me feel that i was born for a reason,,,thers a purpose for my life,,,thoughts of her made me work hard,,every nightout's seemed for a reason ,,i was feeling sumthing which i never felt in my entire life.... yes i was feeling wat love really meant,,,,,but i didnt have the guts to open my mind to her,,,wat she meant for me,,, the fear ( the dark aspect of my character) kept me away from doing it,,,,and time went on...atlast the time for all of us to part away finally arrived,,, i was in bad state-- on one side my love for her pushed me forward on the other side my fear tried to hold me back,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,and finally my fear won over,,,,and she was gone without ever knowing that i had loved her like nothing else,,that sumone is still thinking about her and wiping away his tears,,,no words are enough for describing how i felt for her,,,,,

May be thats life for you..... as they say "man proposes but god disposes",,,, may be god have decided something much better for both of us ( for her i would say)

i always try to remind myself of all things i just said above (gods decision and fate),,,,,but in reality these have never succeeded in healing the pain,,,,removing those sleepless nights in which i cried silently.....dunno whether she wud have accepted me or just said no and walked away,,,,,,but at least she wud have known how i felt for her,,,,,,always thought if god wud have given me a little more courage.... then i wud have not in such a state,,,,,any ways she is all but gone,,,, and even though i might not even see her again my love for her will continue and it will only end wit my end,,,,,,,

DEAR MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND MAKE YOUR LIFE HAPPIER THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLY THINK OF!!!

The First Post............

2008-11-08T01:07:00.000-08:00

Hmm,,,,after a long time have finally decided too do something new rather just chating or google...
Hav been thinking for a while abt tis ,,but was first reluctant in starting a blog,,mainly because i was always afraid of putting my views infront of others,,, may be t fear of getting rejected or ridiculed infront of others....cannt quiet distinguish wat was the fear ,,,,,but it always remained deep inside me,,,,
And even in tis venture is mainly because of my two freinds ,,whose words i cannt simpy reject,,,may be they know me more than wat i know abt myself,,or may be they want me to get rid of tis fear for once and all....So i have finally decided to start a blog.,,,,,i wont be regular poster but wud try my luck whenever possible.....

HAil Humanity!!!!